Back on Track!

I had my great weeks where I tracked every bite and always stayed within my calories for the day. 

I've had my horrible days where all I'd track was my healthy breakfast and then went bonkers with my eating the rest of the day and didn't track after that first meal. 

But I've never missed a single login since I started up again. The streak I had going meant everything to me, and even on those bad days (or weeks) when I wasn't on track with my healthy goals, I made sure to log in because I didn't want to lose my streak .. Because healthy me on a good day would be really upset! 

That means I never gave up on myself. Through the hard days I always kept my goal in mind. That's a pretty good feeling to me :) Maybe I am finally learning what truly healthy living is this time around!

So, in celebration of my 95th consecutive login to My Fitness Pal (and my 95th day of dedication!), I am proud to announce that I have officially lost 36 lbs! Yes, it's just a number on a scale and doesn't show the inches I've lost or the muscle I've gained .. But it is still nice to see that the fat is indeed melting away, slowly but surely. 

Have a wonderful weekend, everyone :) 

It's Not Just For Me

(This post was written a long time ago and I'm just now having the guts to share it!)

Small note: I understand that there are many levels to depression and that there are people who need more than exercise and healthy eating to manage their downswings. I am compassionate for those people and am in NO WAY passing judgement for needing medication. I am fortunate to be able to manage my depression without medication, though that is not saying at some point in my life I won't ever need help. This post is about what is helping ME, NOW. 

Ready for some deep, personal stuff?

I had a long, emotionally charged conversation with my hubs this week.

I stated (through torrential tears and heaving sobs) that I feared I was losing my battle with depression and that I was going to have to seek my doctor's help, as in, get back on antidepressants. This felt like a huge step back to me because I've worked so hard over the past two years to stay afloat of my depression by taking care of myself, learning how to live positively, removing negative sources from my life, being a better person and, of course, by eating healthy and keeping active. And I felt like I was losing the battle. I was constantly moody, filled with anxiety, needing to be left alone, not caring properly for myself, and expecting everyone to just be supportive and let me work my way through it. Everyone was supportive, no problem there. But I wasn't doing my part - I wasn't working through it. I was wallowing in it. 

My husband was great. He knew I needed a kick in the pants. He tough loved me. 

He said that he knew with 100% certainty that my depression was immediately caused by my bad eating and lack of self control, and by my misery of not committing to something that makes me feel good - exercise. And I was suffering with guilt because I wasn't being a good mom (or wife, or sister, or daughter) and that brought me further down. He told me that it wasn't fair for him, our kids, or anyone I cared about to keep going down that path. And he was completely right. In my heart, I knew it. 

The first week was really hard .. I had to struggle to get myself up and active and eating better. I had great days and I had not so great days. Those days, I had to dig deep and remember my WHY. Pulling out of depression is one of the hardest things to do .. But I have a damn good reason. My family.

I work out and eat better for my optimal health. I feel so good every day. My energy levels have never been better and I'm so happy that I have goals that I've set and am working to achieve. I have a purpose. It's amazing how not eating junk and exercising can make me feel SO alive! What a difference. I'm actually doing what I've always wanted - to live healthy, to teach my children about living happy and healthy by being their role model, and helping others through my story. 

I exercise and eat healthy to be the best ME .. It makes me happy. I feel good and am looking good. I do it so I can give my 100% best to everyone I love. 

I don't do it just for me. 

I do it for them. 

Big Things Happening!

I won't get too much into it .. I want to work more details out before I do, but I've got big changes coming to my life that I'm really excited about. 

I'll be building my dream board this week. Visualizing my goals, putting them up on the board and seeing them every day will keep me motivated to achieve some of my short-term goals and then, some long-term ones!

I'll be starting a new fitness challenge. 

I'll be working on ME - physically, sure, but emotionally and mentally. Personal development for the win!

I'll be taking the first few steps into realizing my dream career goals. This is going to be a long journey but nothing worth having ever comes easily!

I have so much that I want for my life and for the lives of my family .. Time to stop waiting for the right time and get my dreams started. 

Xo Mama Lego

Time Hop

I saw a few friends using the Time Hop app and I thought it was a fun idea, so I jumped on the train and downloaded it too. At first I wasn't impressed - none of the pictures were loading! Then once I fixed a FB issue, I was in business.

And I am SO happy I got the app. 

It is so much fun, walking down memory lane every day, seeing what I posted on this day one year ago, up to five years ago.

One thing that really stuck out? Two years ago yesterday, I became an ambassador for #sweatpink. I was huge on my health and fitness. I was on top of the world. I had goals. I felt great. I was happy.

Today, I still have goals. They're just lost in the jumble of my daily schedule. Between working both jobs to balancing housework and raising the kids, I've lost sight of my goals. They're still there, sure, just tucked away and not made important.

I think it's time I untuck those goals. I've been slipping with my diet and exercise lately and I'm not happy about it. I do want to keep losing weight and I want to live healthy, for myself, and so that I can be a good role model for my kids. I have career goals in the health and fitness field that I certainly won't achieve by binging on Ben and Jerry's on the couch after a long, hard day. 

I've got to make my health my number one priority. And as of right this second, it is. Because my being healthy will help all my goals and dreams fall into place. 

I hope you remember why you're on your journey .. And not to lose sight of your goals. It's okay that we slip - that's part of the process - but it's also equally important that we catch ourselves! 

I'll leave you with one of those cheesy fitness motivational photos that we always see floating around in social media .. Only this one spoke volumes to me. 

What does your body say about your lifestyle? 

Time Hop

I saw a few friends using the Time Hop app and I thought it was a fun idea, so I jumped on the train and downloaded it too. At first I wasn't impressed - none of the pictures were loading! Then once I fixed a FB issue, I was in business.

And I am SO happy I got the app. 

It is so much fun, walking down memory lane every day, seeing what I posted on this day one year ago, up to five years ago.

One thing that really stuck out? Two years ago yesterday, I became an ambassador for #sweatpink. I was huge on my health and fitness. I was on top of the world. I had goals. I felt great. I was happy.

Today, I still have goals. They're just lost in the jumble of my daily schedule. Between working both jobs to balancing housework and raising the kids, I've lost sight of my goals. They're still there, sure, just tucked away and not made important.

I think it's time I untuck those goals. I've been slipping with my diet and exercise lately and I'm not happy about it. I do want to keep losing weight and I want to live healthy, for myself, and so that I can be a good role model for my kids. I have career goals in the health and fitness field that I certainly won't achieve by binging on Ben and Jerry's on the couch after a long, hard day. 

I've got to make my health my number one priority. And as of right this second, it is. Because my being healthy will help all my goals and dreams fall into place. 

I hope you remember why you're on your journey .. And not to lose sight of your goals. It's okay that we slip - that's part of the process - but it's also equally important that we catch ourselves! 

I'll leave you with one of those cheesy fitness motivational photos that we always see floating around in social media .. Only this one spoke volumes to me. 

What does your body say about your lifestyle? 

My Bum is Shrinking!

Hi, Friends!

I can't believe that summer is half over and that back-to-school madness is quickly approaching .. I just completed my kids' summer wardrobes and now I have to worry about running shoes and jeans and sweaters?! I know that time flies when you're having fun, but does it have to fly turbo speed?!

With summer being halfway through, it also marks the halfway point with my PiYO challenge! So far I've really stuck to the plan - six workouts per week (with the exception of yesterday, as I was under the weather). Every day seems to present a hurdle that I must work around to get my exercise in, but I've been able to find time every day to squeeze it in. And I'm loving it. It's SO challenging .. But with every workout, I notice my body is getting stronger, lasting longer, and I'm really able to push through the workout of day. 

My body is really starting to tone down as well .. Like, where is my ass going?! My booty has always been large and in charge .. But it's slowly starting to shrink. Which is nice (even though Khloe Kardashian has really taught me to love my curves!). I can't believe what a difference PiYO has made in toning my body. I'm gaining muscles, which is so cool, and my flexibility is increasing. The hard work is paying off! 

Drenched with sweat - the end result of every.single.workout.

I went through a (bad!!) period where I weighed myself every day, which I always swore I would never do .. But I did. And it was not good. I'd get frustrated when my weight fluctuated upwards instead of heading dowwwwwnwards. I'd be doing everything right - eating within my calories, tracking every bite, drinking all the water, working out .. And the scale would be going up. I'd be angry, depressed, and frustrated. Then I saw this, posted on FB by a very inspiring Beachbody coach:

He is SO right. And it totally snapped me back to a normal thought process. I'm not going to weigh myself daily and stress over every little ounce gained. I'm not going to worry about not getting instant results. I'm going to trust the process - if I work hard, I'll get my results. Because in the big picture, my heart IS getting healthy and ultimately, that is the most important thing! 

Now I'm weighing myself once a week, every Wednesday morning. And I now understand that with my workouts, I may be burning fat but also gaining muscle mass, so I may not lose a crazy amount of pounds every week, but I'm losing the fat and that's awesome! 

Sorry for rambling on so much .. Maybe I should be posting more often? ;) 

Have a wonderful long weekend! 

July Update!

Hey friends! 

It's been a while so I thought I'd update you with how things are going.

I'd started back on Weight Watchers and really struggled through the first few weeks .. I'd have two good days, one bad day, and that cycle made for some slow but steady weight loss. My head just wasn't 100% in the game. 

My meetings were ahhh .. How to say this gently .. A little less motivating than I was needing. I would dread going to the meetings. I tried different times and different leaders, and they were nice and all, but just lacking in the inspiration department. In short, I got nothing out of the meetings except for my weigh-in. I was following the program fine on my own .. But why pay for something that just wasn't giving me what I needed?

So I cancelled my membership, bought myself a new (functioning!!) scale, and reactivated My Fitness Pal account. 

And I'm doing amazing. 

My old My Fitness Pal account started me off at the exact weight I'd started at when I joined Weight Watchers, so my progress is still recorded and ongoing. I'm down 23.2 lbs now and feeling great. I've lost my winter weight gain and then some! I'm on a good path! 

And I can finally fit into the compression yoga outfit I got months ago!! 

(I can't believe I'm sharing this photo lol)

I'm starting a new workout program on Monday .. It's an at-home DVD program called Piyo, which is a combination of Pilates and yoga. Six workouts a week. I'm really nervous for this challenge (it's going to be hard!) but I'm SO excited to start. I remember how yoga really helped tone my body when I was doing it regularly last summer / fall so I know that if I work this program, then it'll work it's magic on me. 

How is your summer going?! I've been loving mine so far. Having the boy off of school has freed up so much time for us to hang out together as a family. More family walks, more water fights, and more fun! :) 

We'll chat soon .. Wish me luck with Piyo!